Genesee County Mental Health

Jim Banish would probably give anything not to have the story that serves as a foundation for his nonprofit first responder training efforts, yet he has promised his family and himself that brother Joey didn’t die in vain.

Banish, a former police officer for 27 years and founder of New York Law Enforcement Assistance Program (NY LEAP), used the tremendous pain of his brother’s death by suicide as the impetus for doing what he could to improve the mental health and wellness of active or retired law enforcement members and first responders.

“I really want to offer them hope, I want to offer them knowledge, and I want to offer them a platform where they can go and get the help that they need themselves to live a long and healthy, happy life. Our life expectancy in law enforcement is 58 years old; it’s about 20 years less than the national average, and I don't think that's fair,” Banish said to The Batavian after a workshop Friday at Genesee County’s Emergency Management Training Center. “So my ultimate goal is to really bankrupt the retirement system with retired cops. But I want to give them hope, and I want to give them light, and I want them to know it's okay not to be okay, and you can go get help and break that stigma and make sure that they're not getting punished for asking for help.”

He and co-presenter Andy Carrier drove up from Georgia to talk to the class of nearly two dozen people from the county Sheriff’s Office, Dispatch Center, Batavia City Police, Department of Corrections, Emergency Management, and Mental Health.

They talked about the compounding effects of dealing with crisis and the physiological effects of trauma, including heart disease, panic attacks, irritable bowel syndrome, nausea, fatigue, and hippocampus shrinking and hardening.

“PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) is now a line of duty injury,” Banish said. “It has a physiological effect. With trauma, it has a hippocampus injury. When we’re exposed to the amount of trauma that we’re exposed to, it hardens the lining of the hippocampus.”

These effects can be proven with an MRI test, he said, and is “a physical injury.” The good news is that it can also be reversible with treatment.

Banish, who grew up in Buffalo, knows about how trauma can affect a person. His brother had been with the New York State Police for 15 years when he ended his life. It was not only inconsolable grief for the family, but guilt that Banish suffered with for years afterward, he said.

“The day was April 1, 2008, which was the day my brother went home at lunch and shot himself and took his life with me responding to that scene shortly thereafter it happening,” Banish said. “It left me with a lot of questions and a lot of hurt and a lot of pain in my life. And I had been a police officer at that point for 10 years, and he had 15 years on, and ascended to the rank of lieutenant, he was moving up pretty quick.”

Through his own struggle while self-medicating and isolating for the next few years, Banish discovered that there wasn’t much out there in the way of resources for police officers when they especially needed it, he said.

“I wanted to start helping other police officers after I got help. I didn’t realize that it also encompassed corrections officers and dispatchers and fire, because they all see so much trauma, we all do in this field of first responders,” he said. “So after NY LEAP got launched —in 2017 — we started hosting post-critical incident seminars around the state. We started training other people to do what I was doing and to train them to be good peers and to get them the resources. Then, I started working with different clinicians throughout the state. And then I started going around the country, and I’ve been as far as California and Louisiana and all over the country to help spread the word.”

He and Carrier reviewed signs of distress, including an increased consumption of alcohol to self medicate; restless nights or days, depending on one’s work shifts; problems at work and not performing well; constant agitation; lashing out at others; destruction of home life and pushing loved ones away while isolating; and deep depression.

While those signs are being felt and exhibited, the officer or responder may also struggle with not knowing where to go for help or the potential repercussions for doing so, they said. There’s a fear of being fired, how administrators and co-workers may treat you, that firearms may be taken away, placement in a mental health facility, and/or of not knowing who to trust.

Current law enforcement culture is that:

• You can handle anything.
• Rub some dirt on it, and get back in the game.
• Laugh it off, make a joke, and it will help you get over it.
• Don’t ever let any other member know something is bothering you.

In addition to addressing suicide and PTSD, NY LEAP staff also aim to reduce the rates of divorce, alcohol abuse, cumulative stress disorder, anxiety, and depression. Evidence-based techniques and services are provided through education and training to help first responders live healthier and happier lives and be more productive and effective at work, the material states. 

Healthy officers and responders are better equipped to improve relationships with the communities they serve, which in turn helps to create cost savings for departments. NYLEAP was created by peers, for peers, to help fight the stigma associated with first responders asking for and receiving help by having open conversations about mental health and the impact of trauma, the material states.

“The statistics are continuing to grow at alarming rates in terms of number of deaths by suicide; along with the frequency of PTSD, cumulative trauma, alcohol/substance use disorders, and other mental health concerns that may be caused by the day-to-day stress and trauma from the job,” it states. “In 2022, the number of reported deaths by suicide in law enforcement outnumbered felonious line of duty deaths by near triple rates. Our goal is to equip officers and first responders with the tools needed in order to provide individual and group peer support within their own agencies and with other responders throughout the state.”

Banish and Carrier recommended several books, including “Emotional Survival for Law Enforcement” by Kevin Gilmartin, “Man’s Search for Meaning,” by Viktor Franks, and “Invisible Heroes,” by Belleruth Naparstek.

The duo was excited to announce the debut of Valor Station, a behavioral health treatment center exclusively for first responders seeking help for mental health issues, to be opening Monday in Augusta, Ga. The goal is to open other sites throughout the country in the future, Banish said.

“It’s about us creating a place for us,” he said. “It’s built by first responders for first responders. It has taken a lot of time and effort. We’re gonna take care of each other and keep this going.”

His parents took a recent tour of the place and were greeted with a large memorial photo of their beloved late son Joseph, alongside his framed uniform. That’s a reminder for all that this young lieutenant’s life meant something, and he did not die in vain, brother Jim said.

“I promised my parents he won’t be forgotten,” Jim said.

Genesee County Mental Health Director Lynda Battaglia invited NY LEAP to offer the workshop as an overview of what officer wellness is, and to spotlight the very real need out there to take care of this county’s first responders, she said.

“What they see every day, what they respond to every day, builds up day after day, week after week, year after year, and a person can't carry that alone. They have to be able to process what they have seen and what they've been exposed to, and the only way to do that is by talking about it,” Battaglia said. “So talking with mental health, talking with a peer, somebody that's walked in their shoes, a clinician who understands, knows how to process trauma, I want to highlight officer and first responder wellness in the county because it's extremely important. We need it.”

Battaglia said she feels this topic overall is off to a good start, with officer wellness programs having already begun at the Sheriff’s Office and Batavia Police Department, and now this mixed group of attendees. As Carrier emphasized to them: “I want to let first responders know that it’s okay to get help.”

Press Release:

The Pembroke Teachers’ Federation (PTF) will be hosting a 5K walk/run on April 26, at 9 a.m. in the village of Corfu to help raise funds for their community. This year, the event will support Genesee County Mental Health, an organization dedicated to supporting county residents with mental illness. Through their programs, community members can meet with professionals to reach their highest level of functioning.

PTF has a longstanding history of supporting Genesee County Mental Health and is looking forward to continuing this tradition. Proceeds from the event will go directly to benefit those served by the organization through different services, including:

• CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy)
• ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy)
• Trauma- Based Treatments
• EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing)
• Forensic Services
• Care Management
• And so much more

“Providing mental health services to our community is something we take very seriously. We want to show our students, families, and colleagues that it’s okay to ask for help. It’s okay to talk to someone and it’s especially okay not to be okay,” said PTF Union President Arron Brown. “Mental health struggles aren’t something you can see by looking at someone, so our job is to make the people around us feel comfortable enough to ask for help when they need it.”

For those interested in joining PTF and the wider community to raise awareness and support mental health in Genesee County can sign up by checking out the PTF Facebook page or contacting civison@pembrokecsd.org for a registration link. Early registration is available for $15 until March 17. All registration after that date will be $20.

Genesee County will have spent upwards of a million dollars on competency-related services for questionable individuals sent to court, Mental Health Services Director Lynda Battaglia says.

Battaglia requested $166,000 during Monday’s Human Services meeting for an additional 730 competency invoices, explaining to county legislators that “I will be coming back to ask for additional funding, but this is what we’re going to pay so far.”

“We’re waiting for some invoices to come in from (the Office of Mental Health) and (Office for People With Developmental Disabilities). When those invoices come in, we will have spent about $775,000 in 2024 on these services,” she said as some legislators seemed sticker-shocked. “So this is 100% county cost. The individual is not competent to stand trial. Therefore, they’re designated to a psychiatric facility in order for competency to be restored because that’s their due process, right?”

A person who is charged with anything from petit larceny up to more serious felony crimes such as assault and who may be incompetent and therefore unable to stand trial is afforded due process, she explained. Defendants have a right to understand the charges being brought against them and to be able to aid in their own defense for the legal process to proceed.

“So if our psychologists deem them incompetent, then they’re designated to a bed, and they have to get restored to competency, depending on the length of that time and the changes, they will come back once they’re restored and go have their trial and their hearing,” she said. 

Legislator John Deleo asked if all of these people were from Genesee County or from other counties, and others asked how many actually go through this process. Each county is going through a similar situation and expense, Battaglia said, and these people belong to Genesee.

“For 2024, we probably have had about eight to 10 individuals. Sometimes we run the risk that it’s the same individual a couple of times throughout the year,” Battaglia said. “Those are individuals who pay their time, go back out into the community, get rearrested, and don’t link with services. So it’s not a huge number of individuals; it’s the cost that is the significant number. It’s about $1,300 or $1,400 per day per person. The average length of stay in a (mental restoration) facility is about 90 days. But this is on NYSAC’s (the NYS Association of Counties) radar, and this is on the conference’s radar, and they’re always trying to push legislation to make changes.”

Legislative Chair Shelley Stein asked her to explain the full process of how someone enters the system and is not only diverted for a mental health evaluation once but that it can be a repetitive cycle.

For example, a person is arrested, goes before a judge, and is released on his own recognizance but has to return. If the attorney or anybody determines that the person is experiencing symptoms of mental illness and doesn’t understand the process, the judge can be asked to order a 730 competency evaluation.

“It’s the judge's decision. The judges will usually order that evaluation, and the judge is ordering me to find two psychologists to evaluate an individual. So through the clinic, we schedule this individual, let's say, for two competency evaluations by two different psychologists, and then they will make the determination as to whether or not they're competent to stand trial or not,” Battaglia said. 

A report is returned to the judge when a defendant is found incompetent. The judge decides whether he or she agrees with the evaluation. Therefore, it is not a decision of the Mental Health Department; it is a criminal justice system decision, she said.

If the judge agrees with the report that the person is not competent, then he will be designated to a facility for restoration services and may go back to the jail and wait for a bed to be designated, she said. When a bed is designated, her office is notified, and the jail transports the person. During that time in the facility, a treatment team does “whatever they need to do in order to try to restore competency.”

“Oftentimes, that might be medication over objection, that might be going through some mock trials to see if they understand the charges. Once restoration is restored, they go back,” she said. “Sometimes their charges may be dropped if they're lower misdemeanor charges because of the lot of time that they've spent in the jail and facility, they might just say, Okay, your time's kind of been served. If they're felony charges, they're going to come back to the jail and stand trial."

Others could be ordered to serve a few months in jail, and once released, they're back in the community and may commit another crime. That could mean another 730 proceeding is ordered. 

"When you think about an individual who has developmental disabilities, if somebody has a cognitive developmental disability, the restoration for that is, I hate to say it, but it's nothing," she said. "We can't restore that cognitive functioning. So they come back in the community, try to wrap services around them, work with service providers. But ultimately, that person has autonomy, and they can decide whether or not they want those services. They might not want them, and therefore the cycle continues.”

Those who are restored go on to face a trial, and some may end up going to state prison, returning to the community, and/or obtaining additional legal services. It’s “very, very individualized,” she said, depending on the crime.

The Human Services Committee agreed to pass along the resolution for approval to transfer an amount of $166,000 to cover the expense of competency restorations for individuals found unable to assist in their defense at a court hearing in the year 2024. 

Sheriff’s deputies encounter a lot of different scenarios when out on patrol, and after a weeklong training on various mental health issues, several of them will be more versed to handle crisis intervention training in this area as well, county Mental Health Director Lynda Battaglia says.

Battaglia and co-facilitator David Moore, an investigator with the Genesee County Sheriff’s Office, wrapped up the 40-hour course with eight graduates Friday at Genesee Community College. 

“It’s a co-instructor, co-facilitated course taught by law enforcement and mental health to really bring the disciplines together. We know that law enforcement responds quite frequently to individuals that are in crisis — emotional crisis, or they have mental health concerns -- and law enforcement needs to be prepared on how to, you know, appropriately respond and assist the individual with the help that they need,” Battaglia said. “We do scenario-based training, we do a lot of education on mental health. We talk about Alzheimer's, we talk about developmental disabilities, we talk about substance use, adolescents, juveniles -- we bring in family members and consumers or individuals who are in recovery. We brought in community resources this week. And it was a great opportunity to connect law enforcement with mental health so that they know that we are here for them, and vice versa.”

The course had been offered some years ago, and more recently, police agencies have been sending their employees to similar training in other counties, Moore said. He and Battaglia just completed an instructor’s course to be able to offer it here, and they plan to do so regularly for the Sheriff’s Office, and Batavia and Le Roy police departments.

“And it's been, I think, a really great experience for our people too, because it's been tough to almost establish and build that relationship with our mental health professionals in the area. And I think that this was a great opportunity to educate them on exactly what resources we have available,” Moore said. “And in doing so, I mean, putting faces with law enforcement and mental health in this area, and actually being able to come together and work together to provide that better experience and a higher level of care for the residents in Genesee County. So, I think that this has been fantastic for our guys, and I look forward to continuing to do that for other members in this county too. 

“So ultimately, we are public servants. We do have to provide a service to Genesee County residents, and as work professionals, we need to be held to that standard. So I think this is definitely a step in the right direction,” he said.

Battaglia added that it’s an opportunity to “really transform” the county’s crisis response system. Law enforcement may go out on a call, and mental health responds with some additional assistance to law enforcement and the community “so that they have a well-rounded approach when somebody calls in distress,” she said.

For example, if deputies go out for someone who seems a bit incoherent or disoriented and is a little lost, “then you know, part of this training is to equip law enforcement with slowing things down and remembering you’re working with everybody, so this could be somebody with Alzheimer’s and how do you approach that using the appropriate tools and skill set to handle the situation,” Battaglia said. 

The course not only went into specifics, but there was also a section about what is mental illness, and the variety of different factors involved, she said. 

“You could have a mental illness and substance use addiction as well as medical problems,” she said. “So, that's a lot for one person to handle. So you know, equipping law enforcement with the tools on how to respond appropriately to somebody who has a whole host of issues and concerns that they need help with just better equips police.” 

What did the class members walk away with? Sergeant Kyle Krzemien has learned a lot from prior training and being on the job, but he did pick up a valuable reminder when dealing with folks he sees who are typically going through some type of crisis.

“Whether it's small or big, it's really big to them. And just finding a way to slow down and just have a conversation with people and be a good listener, tends to help people out,” he said. “So just slowing down and being a good listener and finding ways to deal with certain types of disorders that people have. There's ways to … talk to people with schizophrenia and stuff like that.” 

Editor’s Note: This is the fourth in a series of articles for May’s Mental Health Awareness focus. Despite it being the last day of the month, no topic as important as mental health can be hemmed into such a short time span anyway, as Genesee County Mental Health Director Lynda Battaglia says. Besides, this kicks off June’s “Rebuild Your Life Month,” which will continue with additional articles.

Little did anyone know that Cheryl Netter suffered from bipolar disorder throughout her life. And how could they? Netter herself didn’t know until she received an official diagnosis in her 20s.

“Finally, when I was diagnosed with something that I could explore, and educate myself on and find out, I was relieved. So many people will tell you otherwise, maybe, but I was totally relieved because I knew in talking with my gynecologist and my doctors through the course of the years, I knew there was something more going on inside me. I couldn't voice it, I couldn't put it into words, I couldn't express it per se,” she said. “I used to write a lot. And everything that I wrote about it was dark, death, all of that. And, you know, that's why I look back. And my mom was a big support to me. Not in the beginning. She didn't understand it either. But she started trying to educate herself. And in finally talking, she listened finally, and that's when she started the shift over to when she started sharing with me about her journey. Her mother had a nervous breakdown, my grandmother, back when my mom was growing up. And then my mother, when I was little, I remember her going through an episode, where she was taken away, and hospitalized as a ‘nervous breakdown,’ you know, back then that's what they called them, they didn't have all these diagnoses. And so it was a genetic thing.”

Throughout school and later in her working life, the mask she wore on the outside and the roles she played belied her very low self-esteem and depression. Netter was always the lead in school plays, worked in retail, gravitated toward leadership roles, got married, had two daughters, and from all appearances, she looked “fine.”

She suffered from deep depression, had been hospitalized four times and put on lithium. Abusive relationships and substance abuse -- a path that kept her sinking lower and lower -- all led Netter to the eventual thought that everyone around her would be better off “without me,” she said.

At one of her lowest points, Netter tried to end her life.

“I was in a coma for three days,” she said during an interview with The Batavian. “There is hope out there. I’m living proof of it. There are people out there, you just have to find them.”

Oftentimes, when one is struggling with depression and feelings of hopelessness, isolation is the easier thing to do, she said. But taking that first step will lead to the next one. Her lifeline has been faith in her higher power, God.

“And I know, without a doubt, it's only by his grace, I'm here. I can honestly say that because I have had the opportunity to impact others. With what I've come through. I've never been afraid to talk about it. I've never been afraid to tell people my story. I've never had a fear of people looking at me like 'oh, geez,' I just have never had that fear because I know where my story comes from,” she said. “It's been a journey. And it will be lifelong.

“I do hope coaching. I can’t walk for them, but I can walk with them,” Netter said. “But I can support you with that empathy piece, I think.”

Netter is a hope coach through City Church. A hope coach is a believer in Christ who is devoted to helping others to achieve their fullest potential and who will encourage one to have hope in oneself and God by faith. A hope coach is not a counselor or therapist.

For more information about this program, call 585-343-6895.

Peter Mittiga, deputy director of Genesee County Mental Heath, said that therapist numbers are bouncing back from COVID days, and that has opened up more availability for appointments at the mental health facility on East Main Street in Batavia.

“So I'm really excited about this, and I think it'd be great for the community just knowing, we have walk-in hours every day. Yes, you can be seen right away. But then, currently, you might have to book out two or three weeks for your next appointment,” he said. “But once we are fully staffed, then get right in and start therapy right away, which is great. “Or if somebody is doing very well, they might say, hey, can I see you monthly just to check in, and that's fine, too. 

"And then also individuals that have been in therapy for a while they feel like they don't really need the therapy, if they want to get through with medication. They can be enrolled in our medication management program," he said. "So we have a nurse who will check in with them periodically, but they primarily just come here and they see a doctor and stay on medications for three months. And those are much shorter appointments. So it's not a 45-minute therapy appointment, it's just a really quick check-in with the nurse to see if things are okay. And if that individual ever wants to go back into therapy, we link them up.”

Local Resources
For more information about mental health services in Genesee County, call 585-344-1421 or go to Mental Health Services

For services at the Mental Health Association of Genesee and Orleans Counties, call 585-343-2611, or go to MHA    

For more information from the Rochester-based National Alliance on Mental Illness, go HERE

In a mental health crisis, call or text 988 for resources.

May has had the special designation of being Mental Health Awareness Month, and although public service campaigns and messages remind people about the importance of heeding one’s own and others’ mental health needs, it’s far from a 30-day requirement, Lynda Battaglia says.

“The county Legislature gave a proclamation for mental health awareness month, but really, it is a specific month to recognize individuals with lived experience who are peers who might be in recovery and to really bring light to the community that people need to be aware of what mental health is, from various perspectives,” said Battaglia, director of Genesee County Mental Health, during an interview with The Batavian.

“The county Legislature gave a proclamation for mental health awareness month, but really, it is a specific month to recognize individuals with lived experience who are peers who might be in recovery and to really bring light to the community that people need to be aware of what mental health is, from various perspectives,” said Battaglia, director of Genesee County Mental Health, during an interview with The Batavian. “Mental health affects every part of you, as a person. It affects your emotions, your mind, your body, your spirit. All of it is connected. So in a broad sense, everybody needs to practice and pay attention to what their mental health is, whether they're in a good mental health space or a not-so-good mental health space. And it is something that we should be made aware of all year long, not just in a 30-day span.

“It might affect you more during one season of the year than it does another. Maybe you get into a negative mental health space around a certain time of year, maybe focusing on holidays or an anniversary, the death of a loved one, the social climate that we're in,” she said. “But the social climate that we're in right now, with mass shootings being on the news all the time … that has the potential in and of itself to affect somebody's mental health. And it's not just adults that we're talking about; we’re talking about kids too, kids who are paying attention to the news, and they’re practicing active shooter drills, how to shelter in place, or how to hide, that has a potential to impact youth mental health, right?

"Because they are walking in every day saying, ‘I need to carry my phone with me because, if something happens, I want to be able to text somebody.’ My daughter said that to me a few weeks ago, and it cut my core. Because what young people have to go through today is so difficult.”

Sometimes people are in a profession — social work, therapy, first responders, doctors, nurses — that have the potential to weigh on somebody's mental health, also, she said.

“So I think what I love about this opportunity is bringing light that we have individuals who have a diagnosis,” she said. “And you know, AJ is going to talk on that, but then you have the different perspectives, and mental health is such a broad view that you can really spend a long time talking about, like, what is mental health? And how do you make yourself aware of it?”

From the practical side of this, how does one know if he or she is struggling with a mental health issue versus just having a bad day?
Rachel Mieney, clinical director of Genesee County Mental Health, said that one indicator is when someone becomes overwhelmed by various stressors in the world and begins to notice that “their thoughts or feelings are starting to impact their lives in some way.”

“Then it might be the time to reach out to a professional. And, you know, I think we're seeing less stigma now. And I would like for that to continue moving in that direction, where people are willing to come and get help. It's scary, but it's a very brave thing to do to say, you know, I'm struggling. I need help. And I think one of the big things is that trends that we're seeing in terms of what's walking into our clinic is a lot of trauma, a lot of anxiety, a lot of depression,” she said. “And my message would really be that there is hope. It might feel in the moment like, this is hopeless. Nothing's ever gonna get better. But there's people like AJ with lived experience that says it is possible.

“And from the clinical perspective with working on therapy, goals and interventions that we can use, I've seen clients get better too,” she said. “And that's one of the best parts of my job is seeing someone recover and heal and get through whatever they're working on. And most of our therapists here are trained in trauma work. So that's something really great that we can offer.”

Only soldiers have PTSD, right?
People sometimes think that they haven’t experienced trauma or post-traumatic stress disorder because they haven’t served in the military, fought in a war, been in some major combat situation. But trauma is the worst thing that has ever happened to you. It could be a fight, a car accident, divorce, domestic violence, some form of abuse or witnessing a tragic event.

“When we assess for trauma, we just ask for the worst things that have ever happened, so for some people, it could be the loss of a loved one, it could be a car accident, it could be an injury, and then it could be something more significant, you know, like abuse history. So trauma is really anything that's impacting your ability to function on a daily basis, something that triggers you,” Mierney said.

If everybody looked back into their past and thought about some of the things that happened to them, and it's affecting them now, it's cumulative trauma, Battaglia said. 

Perhaps a person’s parents had an ugly divorce when she was a child, and the home was unstable, or there was drug use in the home, or not enough food to eat,  domestic violence, and/or sexual assault.

“People with trauma, some of the folks that we see, with severe trauma histories really have a cumulative set of trauma. Now, that's not to say that like Rachel said, somebody that has a really bad car accident, that can also be very traumatizing, that might be the one thing in their life. And every time they get back on the road, somebody hits the brake or stops or a deer runs out, it's going to trigger them, right?” Battaglia said. “And they're going to kind of relive that trauma all over again. So, like Rachel said, it really starts to impact a person's ability. And for some, they’re just recognizing it now that that's what it is.”

So what do you advise someone who is depressed but feels stuck and doesn’t know how to begin to get help? That seems to be a bit of a catch-22.
“It is, and it’s just kind of reminding them that it feels really bad right now, but it doesn't always have to be this way. And we'll set small goals so that it doesn't feel like, okay, well, you're gonna do these 10 things, and you're going to feel better. It's like, Okay, we'll do one little thing, like, maybe you'll get out of the house one day, for an entire week, or maybe you'll spend 10 minutes talking on the phone to support. So we set the goals really small so that they can feel like, okay, I accomplished that,” she said. “And then we start building on that. So we really try to just not overwhelm and just kind of meet them where they're at and take it one step at a time. So we can do phone, and we can do video (appointments). So that's actually been a benefit of COVID. We really were able to open up the modality of services we can offer. And that's helped with that trend. Transportation barriers too.”

Local Resources
For more information about mental health services in Genesee County, call 585-344-1421 or go to Mental Health Services

For services at the Mental Health Association of Genesee and Orleans Counties, call 585-343-2611, or go to MHA    

For more information from the Rochester-based National Alliance on Mental Illness, go HERE

In a mental health crisis, call or text 988 for resources.

AJ Scheuerman was 16 when he had his first episode of a yet-to-be-diagnosed mental health illness. It was not only the first incident, but also unforgettable, leaving AJ’s family broken, confused, physically injured, and the teenager left to deal with the consequences in a locked psychiatric ward.

Although AJ’s story may seem atypical compared to the millions of seemingly able-minded people suffering from depression on a day-to-day basis, they all share the importance of this month and what it means to be in tune with one’s own mental health awareness.

Illuminating Behaviors
AJ became fixated on lightbulbs, wearing white button-down shirts, and on cutting himself. Seeing himself bleed  “was a reminder that I'm human, that ultimately, I'm just flesh and blood,” he said.

“So, I’d go for long walks during this time, and just think about different things. One night, I went for a really long walk, and I was listening to my iPod. And I thought that the songs were made for me, that these people knew about me, and they were trying to communicate to me about the secret society that I was supposed to be a part of,” he said.

The Batavia resident would go for these walks, and while listening to songs, he became convinced that the artists weren’t just singing to an audience but that they were singing a message directly to AJ.

After three months, he decided to share his discovery with his parents, but they didn’t have the same response as he did to the music or the messages that he believed he was receiving. He had gone on an extensive walk one night and didn’t return until the next morning.

“I got lost. I actually had to ask for directions from a couple of different places. I got home at, like, 4 a.m. And my mom was waiting for me … I couldn't sleep because I was just thinking about what it was that these people were trying to communicate to me through the songs and stuff. I had this idea that people break away from the Bible secretly. And that was the secret society that they wanted me to be a part of. So in the morning, I tried to tell my parents about the secret society and all this stuff. And they were just listening to me. And I'm trying to put on the songs for them and, like, show them that the songs were talking to me and just give examples that they could be enlightened the same way I felt like I was enlightened,” he said. “And then I didn't get any response from them. So I showed them the scars on my thigh from when I cut myself, which I cut myself pretty much every night. So my thigh was just like a scab. My mom started crying. My dad was like, ‘Is this because I never showed you how to shave?’ And it was just confusing that he would have that reaction."

Confusion to Delusion to Action
"So then my mom, she started crying. And she said, ‘Your dad has thin blood; your dad has thin blood.’ And then I was like, okay, so that means that if he got cut, he would bleed out. Yeah. And I was like, do they want me to hurt my dad? The secret society wants me to kill my dad? And I was like, 'No, I can't do that.' Why are you making me do this? And then that's kind of how delusions start. And then my dad was like, ‘Come on. Let's go to the bathroom. I'll show you how to shave.’ So then, we went to the bathroom, and I took the razor out of the bag of razors. My dad was standing in the doorway. And I thought, my dad wants this. My dad is a willing sacrifice. My dad wants me to attack him.”

And all of that mental build-up led AJ to slash his dad’s face with the razor. His father staggered backward, and AJ slashed him again, dropping the razor to then begin punching him in the head.

“And I recoiled because of the way that his skull felt on my fingers,” AJ said. “And he fell to the ground.”

Meanwhile, his mom had called the police, explaining that her son was just 16. She hugged AJ as his father escaped, and then the police arrived.

“I was taken to psychiatric jail for 39 days,” he said.

Eventual Diagnosis
AJ was diagnosed with bipolar and schizoaffective disorder, a chronic mental health condition in which someone experiences symptoms of both schizophrenia and a mood disorder. These symptoms may include hallucinations, delusions, lack of pleasure, decreased mood and poor attention.

If AJ seems to be one of those anomalies that we don’t run into very often, one in about every 300 people develops this disorder at some point in their lives, according to therecoveryvillage.com.

For Genesee County’s population of roughly 60,000, that’s 200 people struggling with schizoaffective disorder and many more with bipolar and depression, which affects more than 18 million adults (one in 10) in any given year across the United States, according to the Hope for Depression Research Foundation.

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention lists depression as the primary reason why someone dies of suicide about every 12 minutes for cumulative 41,000-plus death a year.

Although Scheuerman, or AJ as he much more prefers to be called, isn’t quite at the point of happiness for being alive, he is at a place of knowing that he has survived his ordeal so far. He was put on prescriptions that have negative side effects, he said, and he has to weigh the pros and cons of being alive on meds versus possibly getting worse without them.

Living to Try Another Day
He admitted that he has never fully sought out and attended counseling of his own volition; it has been something forced upon him, he said. The Batavian asked if he thought he ever would have reached out for help on his own, and he wasn’t certain if he would have. Meds have helped to keep his worst symptoms of violence from escalating, and hospitalizations — he’s had 11 of them to date — have kept him alive.

“I’m still here is kind of my message,” AJ said. “I’ve been through a divorce and just different delusions. I tried to kill myself when I was 17. Because of delusions, and yeah, I’m not living my best life right now. But I’m still here. And I’ve survived what I’ve survived.”

Do you see a place for mental health treatment now, even though you say it’s been imposed on you? Do you think it has saved your life?
“Yeah, I’d say, I guess, begrudgingly, I would say that medication has saved my life,” he said. “So my family, I couldn’t have done it without my family, especially my mom and my ex-wife. I’ve kind of been resistant to therapy. I don’t really get too much out of it.

"I went through psychoanalysis for about a year that it made me realize why I’d had the delusions that I’d had, and I thought that I could go off medication because I had realized why the delusions were the way they were,” he said. “But, ultimately, that didn’t help me either. Just because it was the fact that I was having delusions and not the impetus behind the delusions that I needed to know about.”

A common scenario most people may relate to is when prescribed a 10-day course of antibiotics for an illness. By day six or seven, you may begin to feel better and stop taking the pills because they don’t seem necessary anymore. It was a similar feeling for AJ, he said, in that he started to feel better and believed the meds were no longer required to remain healthy.

And it didn’t work.

“Yeah, I went off the meds, and I was hospitalized within a few months,” AJ said.

This is common behavior, Genesee County Mental Health Clinical Director Rachel Mieney said. A lot of times, people will be on medication and start doing well enough to think they can go off their meds.

“And some people are able to use tools that they've learned in therapy and to kind of maintain the progress they've made,” she said. “And then for other people, sometimes, you need that medication, especially if it's more of a brain chemistry type thing where the medication is really necessary to allow you to be able to function.”

As AJ talked about his struggles and recovery — imposed as it has been at times — he said he considers medication to be a “boogeyman” in his life, stealing who he is at his very core and leaving him not feeling “like you’re the person that you’re meant to be.”

Mieney strongly encourages people like AJ and anyone, really, who is struggling with any type of mental health issue to seek help, not go through it alone, and know that there is hope.

From Patient to Peer
Despite his ups and downs and uncertainties about the joys of life, AJ does have a few positives: he’s “definitely” stable and is able to function in society, he said. He also has a job as a peer guide at the Mental Health Association of Genesee and Orleans Counties to “help people with mental illness.”

Through his own experience, AJ works with others to “focus on helping the person achieve goals.”

“And for the most part, I can’t even tell that people have a mental illness that I work with,” he said. “It’s just there. They’re just people, and they have hopes and aspirations. And I’m there to help them with those hopes and aspirations.”

What does it feel like to be a useful tool for people and to help them?
“It’s great that I have a use for the episodes that I’ve had. There’s no, ‘Oh, I’m not sure what this feels like for them. I’m not sure what to do.’ It’s always like, ‘Okay, I’ve been through this, and I can help them with whatever ailments they have,” he said. “And just the goals that they ate, the barriers that they put on themselves, I can kind of help them to break down those barriers by being like, I’ve come this far … I’m still here, and I can help you in any way that I can.”

Mieney wanted to reiterate that whole piece for not only AJ but others doubting the value of their bumpy lives.

“You’ve been able to use your experience to help other people. That’s huge. A lot of people feel like that, you know: I’m the only one that deals with this. And so you can show them no, 'I’ve done it too,'” she said. “'And I’ve succeeded.' And it’s not perfect. There’s going to be side effects with medications. There’s going to be episodes that happen depending on the diagnosis, but, you take it one day at a time. You work through it.”